Do we create ourselves or find ourselves?

Some questions rose as I was reading this quote: "Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself." For many reasons, some of which are just coming to pass, I have felt like my life has been an unfolding of who I am truly, from the inside and out, the Self, and what I have to really 'show' are my creations. But what does that mean? Don't I have to find my Self first? Do I really know the impact I have had on life itself, do I really know what "I" creates? Do I really know when I actually am finding my Self, finding others, creating my Self, creating others? No I don't because nothing is truly knowable. There is nothing to know. And to be the One who Knows is a creative action in itself. The being and the action coming together is the life creating its Self. And, if I don't know that I know and that I AM, then it is the unknown: a space where life creates us, and where we are creating from the perspective of the Knower, the Soul - not the mind - the one who we are but really don't know quite the magnificence of it and therefore, we create ourselves to discover who we are. Creation when done from that space is a mirror for our true Self. Isn't that what many religions and spiritual traditions are about. Isn't that the quote "Know thyself and you will know God" means. So life is about creating in order to realize who we are (ie: in order to know the knower, the soul). We need both creation and finding ourselves in the mirror of the Self, or the Soul, to know that we are the one who Knows, to know that we are that awareness we call the soul. I am not Annissa, I am the awareness of Annissa who is experiencing itself. And this awareness of Annissa is connected to all the other bodies and identities as One awareness manifesting through the creative Self of people, bodies....From the perspective of duality, It is a cycle, a circle, an ever evolving spiral of evolution and expansion. The one who knows, the knower, the soul knows it is evolving, it is progressing but it is constantly present guiding us to create in order to live and discover who it/we are as one through what we call our humanness. This phenomenon might be something completely obvious and known for many minds (many people) on a spiritual journey and it might be completely new for others. And yet, time is irrelevant. What is new for you and old for others is just an illusion of time. What is real is when we have the experience and then the understanding and the knowledge that we are Awareness itself, that is our real identity, and that Life is really about creating ourselves and then finding ourselves. This is the same as saying that consciousness was first and then consciousness saw itself as just that in the human being. And what matters is that we know we are the knower, the soul within this form of a human being, or a human who is being by the power of life to know itself as pure consciousness.
Annissa, upon a stream of consciousness. October 8th, 2009

Stepping into your Destiny

As I am sitting here having tea, I am stroke by a flow of divine thoughts to bring attention to the power of soul, creativity and meditation. This is none edited stream of divine thought: The main blockage to reach our soul and understand that it is the governing entity in our life is the mind. The mind is such a powerful tool that we were given and used as human being to greatest good and not so great. But we have to remember it is just a tool to build and construct intellectual or practical ideas, categorize, analyze and other conceptual measurement, discernment, judgement, take care of body, emotions, social identity. All this which create thought patterns and manifests much like a holographic universe doesn't have a reality on its own. Therefore we have read and talked about the illusion of reality for eons. However, the soul has been confused into identifying itself in the mirror of the illusion of the mind instead in the mirror of its Self, or the Soul, very much like an artist would look in the mirror and would see himself as a paintbrush. He thinks he is the tool and his reality is based on this erronous idea. In the meantime, his real Self, the creator of the painting, sits and wait until the artist remembers to look in the correct mirror of the vast and powerful Self as himself. So, as human being, we identify to the tool, instead of remembering the one who created the tool is the divine in our soul, our true Self. It is tangible and perceptible when we choose to remember and engage in activities that will allow for that to happen. The soul is our way to our Divine Self. When we practice the Power of Soul and when we meditate, engage in a creative intuitive activity, we recall what the Soul feels like, and we allow ourselves to connect and know the presence, the soul, the Divine in us and the Life itself who dictates and creates our reality, which is Life with love, harmony, kindness, softenss, creativity, sharing ect...we step into our destiny!! It is my goal to teach through the power of soul, creativity without limit, with painting and dancing, meditation, and community commitment, to access our intuitive intelligence and explore or re-explore the power of our Soul and help stepping in to our Destiny. We are beyond healing, we are co-creators of Life. Sunday, August 8th 2010.

The Self has never left

Again and again, I read the stream I wrote back in October, before I came to visit Swami Shyam in India and now, I can say that what I wrote makes more sense to me now. It did not quite make sense when I wrote it. But now that I am returning to Boulder, I am happy to really grasp it on a deeper level. Which shows that the Self never leaves us, truth is always there. And we can tap into it if we are open and mostly relaxed. But it also means that one needs to know what the words mean in a true way, to really deepen the connection with truth and expand the mind. So by sitting with Satguru, I realized the Guru within has always been there expressing truth thru the writings. My attention and comprehension or rather the knowledge and the identification to the divine self that was writing had to follow. So since mid November, I was bathed in the sweet nectar of truth and the sprout of truth bloomed in my mind. Now it will be there forever, as it is the fruit of the forever, the eternal. I am so blessed and forever thankful to Divine and Swami, to help me remember Amuram Hum Maduhram Hum...

Freedom and being the Child who has never got involved

Today, I am inspired by a Satsang in which Swami Shyam is explaining what happens to the child when she is born and then the mind shows up. And i thought: are you that who is forever child, whose world (or existence) has never been touched? And have you use the words and use the form to bring grace of Self to the world, and remained her Self knowing she is not the form, the mind, the ego and whatever else. The one who remained FREE.

Swami said that words and knowledge, and body and mind are of form, and they reached the Self but the Self doesn't not accept words and knowledge of the form. So it remains just the same, forever FREE. There are persons that when the words reach them, they accept them. They became the "I" or the identity of those forms and the words. So which one are you? Are you that free child or are you the one who kept grabing and became mixed with the world? And if you are the last, how did that happen? Like a silk worm, you have thread around your Self with the help of the mind, all sorts of conditions, waves of consciousness that stick to you and to which you identify as you. That is what happens. So now, just know that when you do your practice and your sadnah, you clear out the thread, or your pierce the thread. Know that the light can not be ignorance, or darkness. So if you are the Self you can not be ignorance. Just focus your attention on the Self and little by little purify the mind and unwind your Self, to become free, pure and eternal again.

Finding the 'broken' pieces

It is interesting that spiritual journeys, wether it be in yoga, sufi, shamanism, christianism, buddhism, other -ism, soul healing, ect... we transcend little by little, piece by piece the human conditions and conditioning of the mind, the intellect, the ego, to feel whole again and real, and be happy, healthy, evolved human being. Yet, once we find the broken pieces and put them together, we also think we might understand the picture. Or we might think it will resemble the one we have held. But then you realised there were no picture at all. So you are still in the unknown. This might express as a paradox and a time of extreme aloneness. But this is also the paradox that helps us understand we were never really born in the first place. There are no broken pieces. There are no bigger picture. There are no wholeness. There just is the absolute. But to get to this, you still have to start finding the broken pieces. Wild hey! This is why I love painting from the Space. It is speaking about that in our paintings or drawings. It lets us see the journey, experience the journey, go beyond the paradox while understanding it.

Re-member!! Remember the self and life take cares of itself

All there is, is that. One is all. Peace we are, Love we are, light we are, and life we experience. Life just is. We are in the world but not of the world. Let go all judgement of yourself, others, any thing, any space. Life is unconditional just like the self. Beyond poverty, beyond suffering, there is life. One who sees poverty as a lack of prosperity is not seeing life. Life just is. If you can live your life with the knowledge that life just is and that you are the Self, never born, never dying, uninvolved, yet pure consciousness then you are enlightened. The next step is to be of service as a selfless act of the Self. If you grasp this understanding and apply it , then you have fulfilled the purpose of your birth.
A.

Meditation in Spiritual Practice

People ask about meditation. Why meditate? As we know, there are many aspect to Spiritual Practice and Meditation is a large part of it.
To Meditate is to help ourself and our SELF perceive itself. It helps letting go of the mind so we have a way to go deep into our true nature and realized the SELF so we are finally free for the cycle of Duality, from creating Karma, and we see the world as though it is all a play of light in which the Self and the Life is forever moving like waves on the ocean, knowing that it is all one, and perceive only truth, love, peace, harmony and evolve to the next dimension in a certain way.
But what is the mind then? And how do I meditate. Well, let's see.
Meditation is the so important to spiritual practice and practicing divine unconditional service. It helps us identify with that pure consciousness, Shyam Space, the Tao, the Way, who is us, who is eternal, one, beyond duality of the mind. It helps us transform our consciousness and expand our mind. It helps us understand the one who is doing the service is not the mind, not the intellect, not our ego, not our body with the senses, but it is that Way. Not me, not Annissa. I am just the instrument, who was made by the Way to know itself as the Way. So the mind is just the instrument made up of our external perception and internal emotions, ideas, concept and help taking care of the functioning of the body. Mind is just a functioning tool. But a tool that as human being we have identify with. It is like a carpenter who thinks he is not the carpenter but he is the hammer. Lao Tzu said that the man who knows many other people is a wise man. But the one man who knows his Self (himself) is enlightened. So our mind can not know itself. Our mind is just helping take care of the form, the body, the family, the work, making money, ect... but unfortunately has the power to cover the Way while the Knower, the Way, the Tao becomes aware of itself. To meditate is to be able to little by little lift the cover, and be and know that I am the Knower, the Tao, The Divine, with the quality of the observer, not involved, out of duality, one, all emcompassing, forever, pure consciouness, pure love, pure all, pure knowledge, vast, empty, never born, never dying, from which all is created, who is the creator ect...Amuram Hum, Madhuram Hum, I am eternal, i am blissful, I am the Way. And this is all there is to know when meditate. Fix your attention on that which you are and just watch. Watch the thoughts, do not fight, do not engage. Watch the mind, then watch the Knower and the more you do the more you identify with that, the more your mind will purify. There are levels to that to. But this is what I can share at this time.
Meditation is work on the mental body in a way. And it is work. You are not just sitting. Even if it is just few minutes a day. why? because you have to train with a spiritual master. Because your mind changes and you have to use awareness, you have to face up, be present, recognise your actions as mind, or as Knower, you have to identify with something you don't know...yet you know...the Knower knows...You have to be patient, open to grow, open to purify your mind of attachments. Since I meditate, my perception is attune and quickly manifest around me many "things" and "situations" that reflects my inner world. It also becomes a lifestyle and a way of life. And then when you reach that realized state, you keep meditating and expanding.
But life becomes easier.

The Tao, the way, the Space is so vast. One can poke at it. I have had many experiences of it. Yet, it is not staying and my perception so quickly gets covered up that it's like the eclipse of the sun in a split second. You know it happens but you can not do anything about it. But at least you know!! That is a huge step. Then, it is our work as human being to pierce through that cover and let the light shines thru or the knower, the emptiness, the eternal presence of Life, pure consciousness, Divine Self and be free human beings, happy for real! This work is accelerated in the presence of a Spiritual Master as that is why I appreciate Master Sha, Swami Shyam and others who have pointed the way and litterally helping us uplift the cover. They are us. They are us as our Divine Self. They are the divine presence on this earth. It is such an amazing happening to be in their presence. Thank you Thank you Thank you. We are so blessed!